The Bucket List

Well I wasn't really planning on doing the Bucket List this soon, but my dear friend Angie poked and prodded me in the general direction and the rest, as they say, is history.
If you ever decide to get off the bottom rung and start reading quality blogs with insightful perspectives on pretty much everything, might I suggest you start with Angies Blog

I'm going to pretend that I wrote this Bucket List 2 years ago, because that's when I really started ticking items off my list of Top 10 things to achieve before I kick the proverbial bucket.
As I accomplish each item, I shall simply revert to this post and mark them as 'DONE'.
Easy enough.

So without further ado... herewith my Bucket List.

#1 Play Golf With The Pro's

DONE
I played the Vodacom ProAm which was part of the Sunshine Tour last year.I blogged about it here

#2 Go On An Ocean Cruise
DONE
I've always wanted to go on an Ocean Cruise, and finally did last year. I blogged about it here and here and a few other places if you searched for the words "cruise" or "ocean" on the blog.

#3 Do Stand-Up Comedy
DONE
This is one of the few items that was suggested to me by others more than it was an idea I sprung up all on my own. When the opportunity finally presented itself, I grabbed it with both hands and feet!
I blogged about the actual event here and the run-up to the event here and here.

#4 Travel To Vietnam
I've travelled to many places, some common and some strange and wonderful. I've swam in Lake Geneva and lived in Dubai during the boom and watched puppies being grilled for an outdoor dinner and seen the infamous sex-shows in Bangkok and donated electronic gadgets to the needy folk on the London Underground, but I'll only be truly satisfied once I've visited Vietnam. Soon. Very soon.

5# Have My Own Radio Show
Yeah, I know... who want's to do Radio when TV is where it's all at, right?
But there's something about radio that appeals to me. Even if it's late-night graveyard shift radio. I'd still like to do it. I reckon I may even be half-decent at it. So if there's anyone in Radioland out there and you're looking for a guy who talks more than he plays music, holler at me.

6# Finish My Book
It's taking a while, but I'll get there. Right  now I can't decide between 50 pages or 500 pages.
I have much to say, but I may just end up publishing it as a colouring-in book ;)

7# Live Near The Ocean
I'm a Joburg boy.
That means I'm all about the rat-race, and fast paced lifestyle and busy busy busy all the time.
Yet I always have this dream, no goal, that someday I'll kick off my shoes, flick my nose at the rat-race and watch the sunset with a Kola-Tonic in my hand as I relax on my verandah looking out over the ocean.

8# Do The Otter Trail
A legendary hike through some of the most beautiful trails in the world. If you've never heard of the Otter Trail, do yourself a favour and check it out here

9# Attend An F1 Grand Prix
If I had a choice, preferrably the Malaysian or the Singapore Grand Prix.
Loudest sport on earth and I would love every minute of it!

10# Watch Manchester United Play A Cup Final At Old Trafford
Doesnt matter what final.
Could be the FA Cup, Carling Cup, maybe even a European Cup.
I would die a happy man. Completely and utterly.


So there you have it.
My official Bucket List. Thak you Angie, I quite enjoyed that :)


Now your turn!

The Vodacom ProAm Challenge

Last year I was selected to take part in the annual Vodacom ProAm Challenge, where amateur golfers from around the country get chosen to play against professionals in a tournament which signals the start of the Sunshine Tour.

There are 6 amateurs chosen from a field of over 6000 entrants, so you can imagine my surprise when I got the call. The pic above shows myself and Chanelle who was another of the entrants chosen.
I'm the one on the left, in case you were wondering.

In order for us amateurs to be given a taste of exactly the kind of pressure seasoned professionals are put under each time they play in these tournaments, we were treated exactly as the Pro's would get treated.
From the reserved VIP Parking bays as we entered to the sponsored gear awaiting us upon arrival and everything else in between that finally led to the awards ceremony with the Blue Bulls rugby team as guests of honour.

The final scores were tallied, and for those of you unfamiliar with reading a golfing scoreboard, let's just say it was a pretty close game.
For those of you who are familiar with golfing scoreboards, I suggest you move right along. There's nothing to see here.

In order for us to be playing on a somewhat even keel against the Pro's, we were each assigned a pro caddy. Not that it made much difference to my game on the day.

The pic above was taken during the Supersport interview which was aired on The Golf Bag two weeks later.

This was the Pro I played against, Jean Hugo.
An absolute gentleman and master of the game. He's already won the Sunshine Tour previously. I learned more from him in one afternoon than I did in an entire 3 month course of Golf lessons.

So this was certainly one item I would be knocking off my Bucket List!
To play in a tournament against seasoned professionals, now there's something an amateur golfer doesn't do every day :)

My Superhero Name : Captain Content

It's been an amazing two weeks, but then in all honesty I do say that at least once every two weeks.
It really has though.

You've probably read my previous post about having finally ticked off an item on my bucket list : Do Stand-Up Comedy.
If you haven't, it can be found here . I've been wanting to do stand-up for some time now, and mentioned it in this post , but never realized that the opportunity would present itself so soon.

So I had a re-look at my Bucket List this weekend, and everything that seemed to border on highly improbable, practically impossible, or ridiculously unachievable suddenly seemed totally within reach.
It's like somebody gave me a shot of Kryptonite and a can of Spinach.

Onward and upward.
Time to work on the next item on said Bucket List, which list I intend posting on the blog soon.

I started on a book about 3 years back, and I've been writing at such a slow pace I expect I should have it completed in time to have it published as my biography. A centenary celebration of sorts.

I reckon it's time I kick the writing into high gear.
The other item from the Bucket List which needs to be kicked into high gear is the trip to Vietnam.
The missus leaves on her annual girly holiday with Sabeen, a friend of ours from Dubai, in a weeks time. With our planned family vacation to Cape Town in December, we've decided to plan for Vietnam in the year ahead.

Watch this space for the official Bucket List.

The Day After

So last night was probably the most exciting night after my wedding night and the night my daughter was born. Clearly it ranked very high up there on the list of important moments in my life.

It was my first stand-up gig, and what an awesome event it was.
The line-up included Joey Rasdien, Conrad Koch, Deep Fried Man , Simmi Areff , Aasia Fredericks  (who for some reason thought I was a coloured dude from Cape Town ;) ) , Omer , Laz Gola who writes for Late Nite News on eTV and is also Loyiso Gola's brother, 2Dogs and finally myself.

With just over 1000 people, Deep Fried Man kept asking me why I looked so calm especially since this was going to be my debut performance. I guess I didn't get the memo on being nervous, but that guy is so cool and makes you feel so comfortable, all credit to him for making it as easy as it was.

The guys backstage were a really fun group, and it was nothing like I had imagined.
I expected everyone in their corners working on last-minute material changes and rehearsing their gigs.
Instead what I found was the most chilled group of comedians sipping on beverages and eating pies and samoosa's while chewing the fat about everything and anything.
I was the only guy who kept referring back to my cribs. I guess it just goes to show how professional these guys really are. They have entire sets just waiting to burst onto stage all memorized in their heads. WOW!

I was the warm-up act for Joey, and since he was the headline act and was coming on last, that meant I would be on just before him.
The moment of truth finally arrived.
The backstage door swung open....
The first thing that hit me were the lights...
Then my eyes gained focus and all I saw were faces... everywhere... starring at me!!
10 seconds later I had them laughing, and the rest as they say, is history!!

Pics to follow.

I had an amazing time, and I'll definitely be doing it again.
I'll be at Parkers Comedy Club in Monte Casino this coming Tuesday. Strike while the iron is hot, as the saying goes ;)

Lastly, huge shout out and thanks to Minhaj Jeena and Zakiyya Khan from Bright Sparks Learning Academy for the awesome opportunity. You guys rock!!

Here's hoping the Make Me Maaf Comedy Show is just the beginning of many good laughs to come.

Free Porn & Samoosa Recipes

Look, if that's the kind of headline it's going to take to get you to buy tickets, then I'll be the shameless bastard who posts it on his blog!

With less than a week to go, and ticket sales going out the door faster than tenders out the ANCYL offices, may I humbly and kindly suggest that you SHAKE THAT ASS AND CALL SOMEONE FOR TICKETS!

I wish I was getting paid for this. I'd come around to each of your houses and beat the crap out of you with a rolling pin in one hand and a Credit Card machine in the other.
Come to think of it, I may just come around your house and give you a free ass whipping.
You may just enjoy it too!

Now I've sent a personal message to everybody who follows me on Facebook and Twitter.
I expect to see every one of you at the venue on Saturday night.
I'll be signing autographs and taking a register at the door.

The only excuse for not making it to the show is a Death Certificate.

Call Minhaj on 072 456 7260 NOW for tickets.
First 10 callers get a free hand-job in the parking lot before the show. You don't want to miss that!
I've seen his hands. Trust me! Fully manicured.
If you do block bookings, he may even throw in some spit.

GET DIALLING!!
WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?

*alternatively you can email, FB or leave me a message on the blog and I'll forward it to Minhaj.
Unfortunately I'm not offering hand-jobs, but I'll spit on you for free. *

Make Me Maaf Comedy Show

You asked the question.
Now here's the answer.

"When are you doing a Stand Up comedy show?"

Saturday, 22 October 2011 at the Wits Great Hall.

For more details, go here

It's going to be my first time on stage doing a comedy gig, which means all it's going to cost to see me fall flat on my ass for a laugh is R150.
Sure I'd fall flat on my ass for free, but this is for a good cause.

Besides, some day soon when I'm really famous and wiping that same ass with Egyptian Cotton toilet roll imported from China, you'll be able to tell your kids "I saw him live at his first show!"

Call the number on the poster or the link.
Operators are standing by to take your calls.
They especially love it when you call after 1am. No seriously. They even have mystery prizes at 3am!