Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Hairy Potter : The Series

This post is dedicated to all those people who like to think that waxing or shaving goes against the grain of flaunting what the good Lord gave you.
To all those who believe that a woman is to be appreciated for all her beauty, hairless or hairy.
Yes you, you sick bastards!

I was on my way out of my local bank the other day when this woman who obviously recognized me and happened to be parked right in front of the bank, flashed me.
Not the way you think she flashed me! You sick bastards!
She was seated in her car, and flicked her headlights at me. Better?

Well I didn't recognize her but since I'm never rude to people, I figured the polite thing to do would be to walk over and see what she wanted.
Turns out she knew me from my suburb.
So there I am chatting to her, me standing next to her car window, her seated in the drivers seat, she wearing a flimsy summer dress, me trying to stop myself gagging once I realized that her cleavage was nothing short of a mangrove swamp after a torrential downpour!
The weather report : Slightly hairy with droplets of sweat to leave you nauseous. Dress warm and keep an umbrella handy.

Why?
Why do some women think it okay to go out in public showing a bit of fluff?
Why?
If that eternal question you've been asking yourself is "I wonder if he likes my front lawn uncut?"... the answer is ALWAYS no!!


Beyonce. I think this was for her "If I Were A Boy" video.

Julia Roberts. I think this was taken at the sequel to Pretty Woman, which they obviously decided not to release

I don't know who this is, but that hairy navel is gross.

See ladies. How would you like it if we let it all hang out?

Believe it or not, these wooly socks belong to MoNique, who won  a Golden Globe for Best Supporting Actress in Precious