The Stand-Up Comedian

Sabreen, my 4 year old daughter, is now at that age where she's able to tell a joke with amazing comedic timing.
She's been asking us what our favorite jokes are, and then trying them on her friends and the rest of the family.

So last night I told her an old favorite.

"What do you call a deer with no eyes?"
No idea (No eye dear).

She loved it, and surprisingly she got it immediately. So she decided to try it on her mom when she got home from work. Of course this meant 20 minutes of practice with me as her audience.

At 6pm Shakera walked in, and Sabreen ran up to her, all excited to tell her joke.

This is how it went.

Sabreen : Mom, what do you call a deer with no eyes?
Shakera : Hhmm.. Ok I give up. Tell me.
Sabreen : I don't know! (eye-don't-know) Bwuaahahahaha...
Shakera : I don't get it. How is that funny?

Clearly Sabreen found her version of the joke more funny.

Daughters & Divas

When Princess Sabreen was born, I held her tiny body in my arms and knew that she would grow up to be a giant in personality. She had that look in her eye that told me she would have the attitude to get her through life. I couldn't have been prouder.

Almost five years later and she is every bit that strong and amazing personality I imagined she would become. So today I picked her up from school and as usual, we got to chatting about life in general and the state of the nation. Somewhere between discussing the national budget and the cricket world cup, I asked her where she would like to go for holiday over Easter. I expected the usual 'Grannys', 'the coast', 'Durban' (which are all the same really) or maybe even Cape Town (her good friend Milla lives in a beautiful castle-styled home in Noordhoek). Her answer was "Disneyland in Florida." It turns out her best friend at school is heading that way over Easter and asked Sabreen to join her.

I was 15 and couldn't get my mom to agree sending me to Knysna on holiday with friends. My daughters not yet 5 and thinks its perfectly normal to fly thousands of miles across the ocean to Disneyland with her friend for Easter!

I blame Hannah Montana and Disney Channel!

So after explaining to her where Florida is, and how far away from home she would be, and for how long she wouldn't see me if she went, she still figured it was all a small sacrifice to be on a girly holiday with her schoolfriend.
It was only when I mentioned that Florida doesn't have any ice-cream that she finally conceded.

Fatherhood 1 - Youth 0

Public Schools vs Private Schools

I read an interesting article today about the number of kids now studying at Private Schools as opposed to those at Public Schools. A massive 50% increase in those attending Private Schools between 2000 and 2009. I'm almost certain the 2010 and 2011 school year's saw that number increase.

The full article can be found here.
The most interesting bit of the article though was reading Zwelinzima Vavi from the Congress of SA Trade Unions calling the Private Schools "bastions of class inequality."
Is this not the same Zwelinzima Vavi who lives in this plush Morningside home?

                                

Looks like a classy bastion to me.

I'll admit there was a time not too long ago when I defended the Public School system and honestly felt that it still had tons of merit to it.

Then Government decided to step in and lower the standards across the board, and insisted that Universities lower their entry-requirements too. Suddenly our learners were studying to become Doctors, Lawyers, Engineers and Rocket-Scientists with matric standards that were so pathetic, you would think all they could hope to achieve was a life in Politics.
I guess we'll start seeing these learners filtering into the workforce in the next 3 to 5 years, when we may inexplicably have a sudden upsurge in the number of bridges collapsing, patients dying of toe-infections, life-sentences being handed out to jaywalkers and ultimately, rockets not making it out of backyards let alone out to space!

I hope I'm wrong, I seriously hope I am.
However, since I live with reality and not hope, I guess I'll keep sending my kid to a decent Private School with a rather high standard and a consistent 100% matric pass rate, comfortable in the knowledge that when she enters either the local workforce or decides to ply her trade internationally, she will have the confidence of knowing that she measures up to any standard.

I shudder to think that we build these kids hopes up by leading them into a false sense of academic achievement in secondary public schools, then dangle the carrot at tertiary institutions with lower-than-average  international standards, and when they travel abroad to compete in an open playing and paying field, they end up looking like dunces. I don't blame the learners. I blame Government who seem misguided in their attempts at churning out degrees and diplomas at any cost.

The Chronicles Of Sabreen

Thankfully her taste in music doesn't include Justin Bieber or The Jonas Sisters!

Her taste in shopping however, does include Guess.

Ok I'm not sure where she may have got this idea from ... ;)

And In Today Already Walks Tomorrow

The title of this post is from a quote by Samuel Taylor Coleridge.

Sabreen and I were having a chat this afternoon about a dead bird she had found in the garden.
She seemed to understand the concept of death, but was a little confused about why death was so final. I sensed this when she asked me whether the bird would fly again tomorrow, once it had gotten over this whole death thing.
"How long will it be dead for Dad?"
hhmm... tough question.

So I decided to change the topic to something more apt to a 4 year old's reasoning, as Sabreen once set on an issue never let's it be until she fully understands it. She's like me that way. We can both be extremely tenacious, a trait which would be admirable if it weren't so intense when we're being that way toward each other!

Passion.
The one thing you enjoy doing above all else, and something you could possibly be really good at.
That's the topic we settled on.
I love the fact that she's at that age where I can capture her attention and engage her in conversation, and she's intelligent enough to contribute to the subject matter.
So I asked her what her passion was... what was the one thing she felt she did really well, and absolutely enjoyed doing.
She thought about this for a while, and replied "Listening".

That's just as well, since my passion is talking :)

Sabreen the Listener.

The Mexican Stand-Off

Today was Father-&-Daughter day, and I decided to take Sabreen to Sandton City for lunch and a bit of shopping.
I like choosing her outfits even if only because leaving the choice to the missus would mean Sabreen looking like a mismatched circus act.

*Something tell's me I should sleep with one eye open tonight. Just a hunch*

So there we were, taking a leisurely afternoon drive to the mall, when I asked her where she would like to go for lunch.
This is a transcript of the conversation, between a father and his 4yr old prima donna.

Me : Right then, where should we go for lunch?
Sabreen : Haagen Daz.
Me : Haagen Daz is not a lunch venue. It's an ice-cream shop.
Sabreen : I know that.
Me : You want to have lunch at an ice-cream shop?
Sabreen : Yes Dad. Don't be a fuddy duddy.

Did I mention that she's just 4?
Lord help me when she gets to 14!!

I'd like to think that i'm still young and hip.
I bought those funky Italian sneakers to prove it.
Sabreen seems to think otherwise.

So we debated the issue, and we both had some really valid points.

Guess who won?
In a Mexican stand-off, the smart money would be on her.

The Moment Before The Moment Of Truth

This video was taken literally the day before Sabreen took her first steps.
Thursday 6 December 2007, age 16 months.
You can see her contemplating it, and in deep discussion as to how it should be project-managed.

The Pacifier

I was going through some of my old videos earlier this morning, and came across this one.
This is Sabreen at 14 months.
Her favourite doll, Baba, which she received as a gift when she was born, finally got lost after four years of intense friendship and bonding.
She watched this video with me earlier, and the tears slowly rolled down her cheeks.
Amazing how kid's get so attached to their favourite toys!

A previous blog post about Baba can be found here
http://thekalooreport.blogspot.com/2010/05/untimely-death-of-baba.html

The Chronicles Of Sabreen

This is my little girl, Princess Sabreen.
That's not just an endearing title; it's the name in her ID and Passport!

She and I were scrolling through the blog the other night when she rightly pointed out that there were no pictures of her on it.
So observant and she's only 4.

This then is the first of my posts dedicated to Princess Sabreen.

A kid in her class at school was absent for a week, and it turned out the kids little brother of 2 had passed away due to illness. Princess Sabreen's teacher Mandy was telling me about the passing on of Kyle and we happened to be chatting in the presence of PS.
PS looked at me after a few minutes and asked if late Kyle's parents would have another baby.
I responded that it may happen but I doubt it would be anytime soon.
PS then looked at me and teacher Mandy and asked, "How do they make another baby?"

Hhmm... Good question.
Oh look! A pink elephant!

The Princess And The Pout

Princess Sabreen.
She turns four on the 28th of July.
Don't be fooled by the number though; she's got more attitude in her than most twelve year olds I know!

A few day's ago, she and I were having your standard father-daughter chat as any regular dad would have with his four year old daughter; we were discussing the value of education and the repercussions of not having clearly defined goals to achieve. You know, just a good old chit-chat between a dad and his little girl.

So there I am explaining to her as best I can, that staying in school and doing well means she will always have a roof over her head and food on her table. As fate would have it, the words had barely left my lips when we pulled up at a traffic light and a beggar inched his way toward my open window.

She looked at him with a cocked eyebrow, then looked at me, and said "He should have stayed in school, hey Dad."

I'm always amazed at the workings of a child's mind, and how they put the puzzles together in their little heads.
Here endeth the lesson.

Waving Flag

I was on Page 2 of this note when I decided to delete the entire thing.
Nothing I was writing made much sense. My mind was in a blur.
It's akin to the feeling of having lost a pet or a loved one. I'm not eating right. I'm having restless sleeps. I feel moody and crabby all the time. If I were female i'd seriously contemplate a pregnancy test.

Why?
This the question I keep asking myself.
Why did Bafana lose?
Why did they play so hopelessly and terribly?
Why did Saurez have to betray the nation so?
Why did Forlan's mother have to do the horizontal samba with his father?
Why?

I guess i'll never know the answer to these questions.
In the meantime, I have K'Naans song to keep me company.
I'm not thrilled with Shakira's WakaWaka; i've said this before.
But whenever I here Waving Flag, I love it!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=utl-uOdX12w&feature=player_embedded

In other news, I realised I don't have as many pics uploaded on this blog as I did on all my previous blogs.
So in a feeble attempt at addressing this shortcoming, I present to you one of my favourite pics of Princess Sabreen.
She turns 4 in July!
I think I started my very first blog just before she was born! How time flies when you're having fun..