Monday, November 29, 2010

Holiday Hangover


I never thought I'd say this, but I miss being on holiday. I always said that my idea of a perfect holiday is being at home surrounded by my books, with a wireless broadband internet connection, and a PVR filled with sport and a few choice movies.
After having been on the cruise, this has changed ever so slightly.
I still love being at home and doing the things I enjoy doing, but every so often I wonder what's happening poolside and how much longer before my meal arrives. (This is the point where the missus asks "Hows that different from when you're home?")
Well, when I'm home I don't hear the sound of the ocean or see seagulls on opening a window.
Also, 5000 miles out at sea makes it a little difficult for clients to call me and set up urgent meetings, where for some daft reason lately they've been serving the most vile food. One of my clients is on this huge cleansing diet and naturally she thinks it's polite and proper to cater her dietary requirements to the good folk attending the meeting.
Out with the samoosas and delicious steak pies and yummy morning drinks, and in with yoghurt and muesli and soya in every shape and form you can imagine, served with water of course.

On the plus side it's immediate effect was a drastic reduction in the time spent during these meetings. On the down side, travelling 18 floors down an elevator with a bunch of angry hungry people who have just had yoghurt and muesli can be an exercise in clean-air filtration techniques. I'm ready for deep-sea diving.

Back to my holiday hangover.
A sure sign that it's more serious than initially thought is when you order coffee from the convenience store at the filling station, and ask where the pink umbrella and complimentary sandwich are.

There was a couple on board the ship who won their cruise in a Bingo competition. Needless to say, the competition organizers stuck them so far down the ship in a cabin without a pothole, they could hear the barnacles making love in the middle of the night. It was their first holiday on board a ship and they were just thrilled to be there, even if they hadn't fully understood the perks that came with ocean cruising. On the last evening on board the ship, someone informed them that all meals were complimentary. Until then, they had been stocking up on snacks each time the ship docked. They just assumed that all meals would be billed to your cabin!

It's been a week already and my head is still a big fuzzy marshmallow of productivity.
If this doesn't clear up soon, I'll be forced to take some time out and attend to this fuzzy head issue.