Monday, May 10, 2010

Give Me Freedom, Or Give Me Oxygen

Ok, im keeping it short, sweet and to the point today.
Like I always do :)

Being the proud owner of a construction company, I have the enviable pleasure of meeting all amnner of interesting people on an average day. Some end up being featured or at least mentioned in my notes, but on the odd occasion I am compelled to dedicate an entire piece to just one individual.

Today that award goes to my Malawian helper, Ronald. A silent man of the most timid nature, I hadnt realised that he could speak or understand English for the first 2 weeks he worked for me. I just naturally assumed he was a mute with an amazing grasp of Lip-Reading, for he knew what I was saying even when I wasnt facing him whilst I spoke.

But alas, I transgress.

My preferred mode of transport, being in the industry, is a nice comfortable 2 seater bakkie. It was just after lunch today when the infamous Highveld Thunderstorm struck, and for anybody who's lived in Jo'burg for longer than a year can atest, when the heavens open during one of these thunderstorms, all hell breaks loose.

So there we were, Ronald and I, having just wolfed down a flame-grilled quarter chicken and fries from Nando's, happily bouncing along side by side in my little bakkie, rain crashing down in buckets all around us, windows rolled up and aircon set to "warm" to as to keep the windscreen clear and visible, Natasha Bedingfield playing on the radio, when Ronald decides to break his usual silence with a fart of biblical proportions!

I swear this all all true.
Why these things happen to me, im not sure, but if the good Lord is trying to tell me something, it must either be that Ronald needs to get fired, or I should stop buying him Nandos (or maybe that I need a more powerful aircon).

Thats where this note ends.
I have nothing further to say on the topic.
I have aired my views, its been a blast, but if The Ministry of Labour gets wind of this, they may just send me to the Gas Chamber.